HELLO GOODBYE

I don’t know how to start this, I don’t know what I really want to say or even why I feel the need to say anything at all…all I do know is that my heart is being tugged in one direction while my intellect is tugging in the other, and at the same time my soul seems to be a quivering entity all on it’s own…there is such a feeling of trepidation hand in hand with elation, working in precise unison as polar opposites…each pulling me in conflicting directions!

I will try to let the words flow and take me where they will…if you are along for this ride…let’s hold hands…I think I’ll need this warm and friendly gesture from those who will understand what I am about to say and where my emotions are coming from…and so let us begin this journey together into the unknown.

A journey into the unknown…ironic…those words should come to mind almost instantly, I guess that is the bane of this emotional road I seem to be traveling on these last few days. There are days where the highs are amazing and filled with lighthearted wonderings of what’s to come, a sense of the fun and the laughter that will ensue, the shock and awe that’s being headlined everywhere we look, the suspense of what exactly is coming, the anticipation of international acclaim and the realization that perhaps now, finally, recognition and accolades from an industry and it’s moguls who gave a cold shoulder in the past will now be able to look the man directly in the eye and give him his much deserved, exceedingly overdue salute, a bow in acceptance and appreciation for who he is, what he does and for his remarkable God given talent!

We know who he is… we have our pet names for him…SexySingerMan, OMC, CA, C, The Aiken, Baby, Clay Baby…I hope those will always belong to just “us”, Clay and his original throng of Claymates…for those who are about to come on board and embark on the ride of a lifetime and witness music history being made right this very second, well they will at first know him as Clay Aiken or perhaps just Clay…but they will have to work to make their mark as we have, they will have to add their own nuances to the already established world of “Claymatedom”. There will be throngs of new fans, perhaps all of Europe will fall in love as we have…and there in lies the first vein of my fears…will we lose the Clay we know and love…will he be scooped up by the Romance Countries? Will Clay remember his first loves as he grows and expands in ways unknown to us yet?

Clay? Will you always keep us in a special corner of your heart? Just you and us?? Will you remember the early days and what it felt like to first meet some of us? Will you remember your first cellcert? The first time you heard the term Claymate? I guess one of my biggest fears is that we are about to lose the Clay we have known and loved for so long now. The young man we nurtured, taught and somewhat “raised” for the last three years is about to spread his wings and take off in flights of adventure still unknown to us and we want you to Clay, I want you to spread those glorious wings and soar, but I’m so afraid that you will soar so high and glide so far from us that we will be left on the ground squinting our eyes so very hard just to try and see you. I never want to lose sight of you as you grow and develop into a world renowned mega singing sensation, for I think that is where you are headed…down the Yellow Brick Road to your own sort of Oz. I wish you Godspeed sweet man, please just stay true to yourself, stay on your path and don’t allow anyone to take you from the true purpose of this journey you are on!

You are about to make music history, Clay, you already have to some degree, but…you are about to come into your own…you have fought the demons of your life, you have slain your dragons and gallantly, fearlessly, walked tall with head held high through your rite of passage, plowing through a myriad of life changing rituals and coming out the other end the quintessential man!

You’ve had challenges from the first cry at birth needing a chest tube to help you breathe in the new world you’d just entered right through the growing years when you were either blessed or cursed, depending on how you view things, with two fathers, neither of whom were capable of giving you what you so desperately needed and wanted. But Clay, you are precisely who you are today because of them and therein lies the blessing. However, it was the stuff that you were and are made of coupled with what these fathers could not give to you that made you exactly the amazing young man you are today. That exact recipe needed to be in place in order for the world to experience the Clay Aiken we know and love today. There are thousands of us who want to give you a mighty bear hug and fade the scars on your heart from those who hurt you so much, but were it not for those scars, you might not have been the amazing man who came before us three years ago. Take heart though, as you are now your own man, you have made your own mark on the world and you are no longer anyone’s redheaded stepchild!

A Supernova is a star that explodes and becomes extremely luminous in the process…this is what Clay is with the exception that a Supernova is short lived…I think Clay will have this career for as long as he wants it. If and when he tires of it, he will call the shots as to what direction or path he will take it down next.

There has been a particular song kicking around inside my head these last few days…it’s Hello Goodbye by the Beatles…pretty bizarre considering I haven’t thought about that song in a couple of decades. It’s not even so much the lyrics as they don’t really pertain to anything per se` just the title words and the melody…perhaps I feel like we’ll be saying “hello” again to Clay when his CD drops and the Tour begins, but in essence he might be saying “goodbye” to us for a while as he travels the world if recently dictated prophecies come true.

As we go through this journey with “our” Clay, please let’s continue to hold hands, so that when it come time to say “goodbye”, “ciao”, “adieu”, “adios”, “arrivederci”, “auf wiedersehen”, “au revoir” “cheerio”, “sayonara” or just so long…we will have each other to hold on to, to steady ourselves against the feeling and sense of loss as he continues down that Yellow Brick Road of his. This particular part of Clay’s life does need to be played out; it is his destiny… now we are the ones who must “Let Go and Let God”! Clay must follow the path of his Provident Direction and we can only hope and pray that when he comes home to us he will be exactly who he has always been…a sweet Southern Gentleman, who loves his momma and who treasures his “Claymate” fan-base…a young man who is now not only gifted, intelligent, wise beyond his years and savvy, but one who is acclaimed world wide and has that j\’ne Sequa having become cultivated and polished.

I know as you travel, where ever you go you will leave behind something that no one else ever can, a piece of yourself, your wit, your charm, your very essence…they will see your light as it pours forth from the inside out, they will see, taste and experience the scintillating personality you are and where ever you sing in those foreign venues and arenas, your brilliant voice will permeate those places and leave an indelible lingering melody, haunting and faint that did not exist before. They will know in no uncertain terms that they have been entertained and marked for life by the man we have been touting for three years, the will finally understand who and what Clay Aiken is!

For all you have given to us, for all you are about to offer, for all you have taught us, for the light you have shed and brought into our lives…I want to take this liberty and end by saying for each one of your fans, in a Romance Language…Clay… “Je T'aime Je T'adore”!

May God Bless you always and hold you safely and snuggly within the Palms of His Hands!

By: CorieLuvzClay

June 18, 2006